Saturday, 27 December 2014

Oxfam Appeal

Watching some rubbish TV and in between they showed an advert with some desolate african people seemingly utterly miserable prominent.

During the course of this advert made by oxfam they asked for some money to fix ebola, now I keep hearing about Austerity Britain, so you know where I am going with this: I have found some savings Oxfam can make to help them africans more -

Well you know what I think of their guilt-inducing shit whilst taking £100k+

Friday, 26 December 2014

Extended Christmas Break

Okay, okay I will have to calm down. Not only is today saturday [when we normally play football] and the last time the Scottish League played a full fixture list was LAST SATURDAY!!! but I just heard on the BBC that the Clubs in Scotland are playing today because Scotland had an 'extended Christmas break'.

On so many fronts can I fuck with this, but the main one is, stop judging us on your bizarre english shit; the day us Scots wish to be judged by English norms, we will remove our critical faculties en masse and all return to the Roman Catholic Church whilst still calling it the Church of Scotland, you fucks!

Sunday, 21 December 2014

Peter Houston

I just wonder one thing: when I google Peter Houston, why do I get pictures of some old Bald bloke, and not the flame haired, red mustachioed man I remember from my youth.

Bring back Houstie Hardcore

Phillip Hughes 63*

Now, if you know me then you will know that I love cricket, but you will also know that am a grumpy cunt, so this brings me on to my current gripe.

The main thing that has annoyed me about all that bullshit surrounding the death of an average batsman from the other side of the world is the tacit acceptance of one of the most flagrant flaunting of the laws of criket ever.

When Phillip Hughes was hit on the head by a cricket ball and rendered incapacitated the umpires rightly marked him as 'retired hurt' and the scorecard reflected this: but a couple of days later Cricket Australia saw a marketing opportunity and changed the scorecard to say he was 63 not out.

Now I know this seems petty when a man is dead, but we cannot do this just when we feel like it. There are Laws of Cricket and either Cricket Australia obeys these laws or they have no credibility, there are ways and means of explaining unusual circumstances so when Bert Vance conceded 77 runs in one over it is explained through footnotes, but the New Zealand board never disregarded the laws of the game to make it nice.

So, Cricket Australia, please change it back, for the integrity of the game.

Otherwise we might as well change N.F.Callaway's only first class score of 207 not out to 207 retired dead due to a serious outbreak of WWI

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Scott Arfield

Yes I did just see Scott Arfield saying that we need Hearts, Hibs & Rangers in the Premier League, now only two can go up, and Scott I suddenly remember that you are from Dechmont and that Falkirk FC has made all the money we can make from you, so go fuck a duck!

We will return

Dumbarton v Falkirk 20th Dec 2014

I was just watching the game between Dumbarton & Falkirk on BBC Alba and they had to have the disgusting cheek to say it was between Dumbarton & [gaelic shit]. The football club "Falkirk FC" cannot be translated, the club is not the town, and the town is not the club. I always prefer to use the Scottis and write Fa'kirk, but never about the fitba club who are 'Falkirk FC'.

You nonsense teuchters can't come down to my part of the country and start renaming my fitba team, else I will get you made part of England, then you will be sorry.

We can overdo this stuff sometimes: but Falkirk FC is a proper noun.

Monday, 15 December 2014

Everything is Easy

In my opinion, there are no difficult moral quandaries, they all solve themself.

You know people do not in general support terrorism, but terrorist groups [when you look at it in depth] generally have a legitimate grievance, often something to do with certain people having no real power at state level. After all, for all that nobody has any support for the tactics that some groups used: we can all see why the ANC were a bit pissed off and, in Northern Ireland we can all understand that we all might do something a bit stupid if we had to live with those rancid Orange fuckers!

But time & time again, although I understand that certain islamic groups have grievances, I never see how they are going to garner the wishy-washy liberal support when your regime is asking us to return to the fucking stone-age, nope, fascism is just not a cause celebre!

Wednesday, 3 December 2014

Are we just Fucktards?

This is quite pathetic, Radio 5 Live are fawning over a head clash in the football in a way they never would have over a week ago. Have we raised the level of sportsmen so far as to they are our ubermensch and we are mere fucktards that everything must be analysed when a freak accident occurs: it seems so.

How many people died in the course of their work last week? Why does the media tell us it is really important when it a person who plays a game for a living and not a labourer in a quarry? This bloke was lucky [and don't get me wrong: I love cricket more than I love football] he was paid well to do what he wanted, most people are paid shit to do what they would rather not, but no great ovations for those who go out and work because of the necessity of feeding their families.

Or might I bring up the elephant in the room that he was white & middle-class